What can make a good parent?
A great parent is someone who strives to make choices in the best interest of the kid.
What makes a fantastic parent isn't just defined by the parent 's actions, but additionally their intention.
A great parent doesn't have to be ideal. No one is perfect. No kid is ideal either … keeping this in mind is essential when we set our expectations.
Profitable parenting is not about achieving perfection. Though it does not mean that we should not work to that goal. Set high standards for ourselves then and first our children next. We serve as role models that are important for them.
Top Ten Parenting Tips
You will be an even better parent, if you stick to these 10 tips for parenting tips, and you will stay away from bad parenting.
Not all of them tend to be that simple.
Not everyone is able to do them all the time.
Even though some of these might not be 100 % successful, you will be ready to move ahead using the suggestions in this parenting guidebook.
#1 BE An excellent Role MODEL
Walk the walk. Don't just tell your child what you want them to do.
The best way to teach is showing them.
Human is a special species in part since we are able to learn by imitation. We're programmed to imitate others' actions, understand them, and incorporate them into our own. Children, in particular, watch everything their parents do very carefully.
Thus, function as the individual you would like the child of yours to be - respect your kid, demonstrate to them positive attitude and behavior, have empathy towards your kid's emotion - as well as your child will follow suit.
#2: Love THEM And Show them Through ACTION
Show your love.
There's simply no such thing as loving the child of yours a lot of. To love them can't spoil them.
Just what you choose to do (or give) in the name of love may - things as material indulgence, low expectation, leniency, and over-protection. When these things are given in place of love that is real, that is when you'll have a spoiled child.
To love the child of yours can be as simple as offering them hugs, spending quality time with them, having family meals together, and also listening to your child's problems seriously.
Showing these acts of love is able to cause the release of feel good hormones such as oxytocin. These neurochemicals can bring us a full feeling of contentment, emotional warmth, and calm; from these, the kid, will acquire resilience and not to mention a closer connection with you.
#3: Practice Kind And Firm POSITIVE PARENTING
Infants are born with around 100 billion brain cells (neurons) with relatively few connections. These connections create the thoughts of ours, drive the actions of ours, shape the personalities of ours, and basically determine who we are. They are created, strengthened, and "sculpted" through life experiences.
Give the child of yours positive family interaction, particularly in the early years. They'll then be able to experience positive experiences themselves and also offer them to others.
But if you give the child of yours bad experiences, they won't have the kind of development needed for them to thrive.
Sing that silly song. Use a tickle marathon. Go to the park. Laugh with the child of yours. Give them good attention. Drive through an emotional tantrum with them. Solve a problem together with a positive attitude.
These positive experiences produce good neural connections into your child's brain and form the memories individuals your child carries for life.
With regards to discipline, it seems difficult to remain positive, particularly when dealing with behavior problems. But it is possible by utilizing positive discipline and avoiding harsh discipline.
Being a great parent means you need to teach the child of yours the morals of what's right and what's wrong.
Setting limits and being consistent will be the golden rule to discipline that is good. Be kind and firm when you set rules and enforce them. Concentrate on the reason behind the child's misbehavior. And make it an opportunity for them to learn for the future in a good way, rather than to get penalized for the past.
#4: Be a Safe HAVEN FOR The CHILD of yours
Tey letting the child of yours realize that you'll remain there for them if it is responsive to your child's signals and sensitive to the needs of theirs. Support and accept the child of yours as a person. Be a safe and warm place for the child of yours to explore from and go back to.
Kids raised by parents who are consistently responsive tend to have much better psychological regulation development, interpersonal skills development, and mental health outcomes.
#5: Talk with YOUR CHILD And Help THEIR BRAINS INTEGRATE
Many of us know already the value of communication. Talk to your child and also listen to them carefully. By keeping an open line of communication, you will have a much better connection with the child of yours as well as your child will come for you when there's a problem.
But there's another reason for communication. You help your kid integrate various parts of the brain of theirs, a critical process in a child's development.
Integration is similar to our body, in which different organs must coordinate and work together to maintain a healthy body. When different parts of the brain are integrated, they can function harmoniously as a whole, which means fewer tantrums, more good behavior, much more empathy, and much better psychological well-being.
To accomplish that, conversation through troubling experiences. Ask the child of yours to explain what happened and the way they felt developing attuned communication.
You don't have to provide solutions. You do not need to have all the answers to be a good parent. Just listening to them talk. Ask clarifying questions using simple words will help them make sense of their experiences and integrate the memories of theirs.
#6: Reflect on Your own CHILDHOOD
Many of us want to parent differently from our parents. Even those who had an excellent upbringing and a thankful childhood might want to change several elements of the way they were brought up.
But very frequently, when we open the mouths of ours, we speak the same as the own parents of ours did.
Reflecting on our own childhood is a step towards understanding why we parent how we do. Make note of things you would like changing and think of how you'd get it done differently in a genuine scenario. Try to be mindful and change the behavior of yours next time those issues come up.
Don't give up in case you don't succeed in the beginning. It takes practice, a lot of practice to consciously change one 's child-rearing methods.
#7: Focus on Your own WELL-BEING
Parents need relief also.
Give consideration to your own well-being to avoid parental burnout.
Oftentimes, things including your own needs or maybe the overall health of your marriage are kept on the back burner when a kid is born. If you do not take note of them, they will become bigger issues down the road. Make time to strengthen your relationship with the spouse of yours.
Stressed-out parents are more prone to fighting. Do not be afraid to ask for parenting assistance. To have some "me time" for self-care and stress management is crucial to rejuvenate the mind.
How parents take care of the child of theirs physically and mentally can make a big difference in the parenting of theirs and family life. In case these two areas fail, your child will suffer, also.
#8: Don't SPANK, NO MATTER WHAT
No doubt, for some parents, spanking is able to bring about short-term compliance which occasionally is a much-needed help for the parents.
However, this method does not teach the child right from wrong. It simply teaches the child to fear outside consequences. The child will be motivated to avoid getting caught with behavior that is inappropriate.
Spanking your child is modeling to the kid that he/she can resolve issues by violence. A child who's spanked, smacked, or hit is much more vulnerable to fighting with other children. They're more likely in order to become bullies and to use verbal/physical aggression to solve disputes.
Later on in daily life, they are also far more apt to result in oppositional behavior and delinquency, worse parent-child relationships, mental health issues, along with domestic violence victims or abusers.
There are an assortment of better alternatives to discipline that have been shown to be more effective, such as positive discipline (Tip #3 above positive reinforcement and).
#9: Keep Things In Perspective And remember YOUR PARENTING GOAL
What is your goal in raising a kid?
When you are like most parents, you want your child to do well in college, be prosperous, be independent and responsible, be respectful, enjoy positive relationships with you and others, be caring and compassionate, plus have a happy, healthy and also satisfying life.
Though how much time do you spend working towards those goals?
When you're like most parents, you probably spend most of the time simply attempting to get through the day. As authors, Siegel and Bryson, point out in the book of theirs, The Whole Brain child, rather than helping your kid thrive, spent most of time simply attempting to survive!
To not let the survival mode dominate your life, next time you're feeling frustrated or angry, step back. Consider what anger and frustration can do for you or the child of yours.
Instead, look for ways to turn each negative experience right into a learning opportunity for them. Even epic tantrums could be turned into invaluable brain sculpting moments if you focus on teaching the child of yours, not trying to control them.
#10: Take a SHORTCUT Through the use of Findings In Latest PSYCHOLOGY And NEUROSCIENCE RESEARCH
By shortcuts, I don't mean shortchanging the child of yours with tricks. What I mean is to take advantage of what's currently known by scientists.
To parent is among the most researched fields in psychology. Many parenting techniques, practices, or traditions were scientifically researched, verified, refined, or refuted.
For optimum parenting advice for raising a child and information which are supported by science, here is among my personal favorite science based parenting guides, The Science of Parenting.
Using scientific knowledge is of course not really a one-size-fits-all strategy. Every kid is different. Quite possibly within the very best parenting style, there can be a variety of good parenting practices you can choose based on your child's temperament.
A very good example https://parentinghowto.com/ is using spanking to discipline. You will find many better alternatives, e.g. redirection, reasoning, time-in, etc. You can choose a non punitive discipline method that works best for your child.
Naturally, you are able to additionally decide to utilize "traditional" or maybe "old school" parenting styles (e.g. punishing or maybe spanking) and also might still get a "similar" outcome.
Differential susceptibility has shown us that kids with various temperaments react to the quality of parenting differently.
Those who are more susceptible to parenting quality will have much better outcomes under great parenting but worse outcomes under poor parenting.
Those people who are much less prone may "turn out fine" no matter how strong their parents treat them. Though it doesn't mean those practices are good. These children are simply lucky. They can thrive despite poor parenting, not due to it.
Why take a possibility with sub-par parenting practices when you can use well-researched, better ones?
The importance of parenting can't be underestimated. Taking science based parental advice may not be the easiest way to parent. It might require more work on your part in the temporary but can save you lots of agony and time in the long run.
Final Thoughts On Parenting
The good point is, that although parenting is hard, it's additionally very rewarding. The bad part will be the rewards typically come much later than the effort. But if we try our best now, we'll eventually reap the rewards and have absolutely nothing to regret.
To Happy Parenting!